A lawyer defends and argues on your behalf. If you are found to be guilty a lawyer will still try to ensure that your sentence is reduced. Sometimes they even insist that you are moved to a better jail. The jail that has better facilities. They have to convince the judge of your innocence. A judge is the rigid one. Depending on how good the lawyer is, they tend to pass reasonable judgments. Sometimes the judge can be mean or too harsh. Now in real life, mum is the judge together with dad. Although more often, mum finalizes the judgment. The number of punishments you will receive or she chooses the weapon that she shall use to remove the devil out of you.
But when a grandmother is around, things seem to be easier. She is your lawyer. I cherished two visits the most; when I would visit my grandmother or when she would visit us. Mothers may perhaps see them as intrusive. I wouldn’t know how that feels because a grandmother’s love is the one that defends, argues and lies for you. I remember when my grandmother would be around every day would be a holiday. I also admit that this was when I would get away with many mistakes. If I was to stay outside until five, trust me to come an hour later. As soon as I would sneak into the house I would go and sit right next to my grandmother. While I was sure the judge was giving me a frustrated look, she would also have to respect her mother’s presence. It’s amazing how a mother’s presence changes everything. My mother would try to lecture me as my grandmother would always say “this is how kids are, you once ended up lost for three hours while young”. My mum would quickly also remind her of the beating she gave her. Grandma’s response would always be “times have changed Muthoni”.
How my mum and aunties describe my grandmother is very different from the person I know now. Apparently her pseudonym was fire. There was no scolding anyone, her language was the one of whips. One by one they would be beaten for another person’s mistake. The grandma I know is the one that listens to my complaints and presents them to my mum. She presents them in an authoritative manner even when money is involved. You see that’s why she is a lawyer in her own right. She does not believe in caning but a gentle soft voice. There are so many times my mother would look at her own mother in disbelief when she told her not to shout at me. When my mother would chase me like a mouse, I would hide behind my grandma and wail. It is safe to say she allowed me to showcase the brat that lived inside me. My brat side that none of my aunties liked too. The biggest threat was when grandma was almost leaving, that week I would try to behave. I knew once she left, I had to be as straight as a ruler.
While at her place I always gain weight. Her solution to everything is food. If you are not hungry you are either sick or angry. She does not understand why people have to watch their diets; her fear is that her grandchildren will be thin. Even when it is very obvious some of us should lose some weight. When my mum would call to give her rules that’s when we would break them. “She said you can only have chips once a week? In fact let us go buy now”. You see, grandmas are bosses in their own rights. They are the reason why our moms are the warriors they are. They carry their old strength ready to donate to us. They walk around giving words of wisdom as they have seen a lot and encourages everyone. Our mother’s call them crying for help while we have no idea. They are not startled by anything, if anything they laugh at our problems. They are the CEO’S that we should never forget.