The Singlehood Series: He Ghosted Her Twice But She Had Such A Crush On Him She Didn’t Get The Hint

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“The hardest pill to swallow? No one owes you anything- not a text back, attention, effort, their time nor explanation as to why they choose not to be around. So please, do you unapologetically.”

Barbara saw these words as soon as she opened her twitter, and before even reading the entire thing, she retweeted it. This one had completely hit home, and she wondered if fate was trying to tell her something.

You see, Barbara had first-hand experience when it came to this. She had been involved with this guy. Dark-skinned and bearded. The perfect combination. He was a little shorter than her but she figured that she could compromise on that.

They first met on campus and he offered to walk her to her destination. Barbara recalls that he passionately stated that he was an atheist. On the other hand, Barbara was a staunch believer. However, she chose to brush this off and be open-minded about everything. Maybe it would eventually lead to something bigger.

They went on dates. The first, a coffee date. Now when she thought about it, she wondered why she had agreed to go on a coffee date for the first date. The guy talked about himself all through the conversation and she somehow zoned off. He talked about his childhood experiences, his family and his school life. Basically, it was endless conversations about himself, and it came off the wrong way.

Despite all this, Barbara still continued to see him. She realised that he only talked about himself when they were together. When they were texting he listened, and he engaged her in his conversations. But maybe that’s because texting is a two-way thing.

Two weeks later he asked her out again. They were to meet at his house, but then on the day that they planned to meet he suddenly went quiet. He didn’t come online in the morning as he would usually. Later on in the afternoon, he sent her a text, and when she tried to confront her he said that she was overreacting. She decided to cancel the date.

Eventually, they met up and had a small meal, and again, he spoke about himself all through. She had decided that she would end things with him if he did it again, but now, at the end of the date, looking into his eyes she knew she was in good trouble.

Things were going great. They texted each other every day without fail. It was that phase of the relationship where you wake up and pick up your phone smiling, knowing that looking at your phone would make you smile.

One day, she woke up and suddenly there was no text. She wondered if something was wrong, but then she thought to give him more time. Lunchtime came and still nothing. So she decided to text him.

Hi, is everything okay?

She checked her phone every five minutes waiting for a response but none came. She would have been worried but she saw that he was online on WhatsApp and so she knew that he was blatantly ignoring her.

Two weeks came and passed, and still nothing. He had been completely quiet. It was now a new semester and she thought she would see him in school. As if fate would have it, the very first day, she saw him. They looked at each other, and then he walked away. Or so she thought.

Later that night he texted her.

I saw you looking at me and then in the other direction. I’m sorry I hurt you.

Yeah, what did you expect me to do? You hurt me. I wouldn’t come back running to your arms again.

I’m sorry! Please give me another chance?

She wanted to say no. She really did, but she just couldn’t bring herself to doing it. So they started to date once more.

They went on many dates, and with each one, she fell even more in love with him. They reignited their spark once more. The problem is she just couldn’t let the fact that he had ghosted her go. She kept bringing it up, wondering why he would do it to her. She told him that if he had done it once he would do it again.

“It’s just, we have some real differences and I didn’t think I could look past them,” he said.

“What?” Barbara asked.

“Let’s not be oblivious. You are a believer and I’m not. Do you ever think about that?” He responded.

“Well, I thought that we both believe in love!” She said.

Eventually, they parted ways to go home. He bid her goodbye, and this time his hug was tighter than usual. Barbara didn’t think too much of it.

When she got home, she texted him asking if he had reached home safely. No response. The next morning she woke up to check her phone, and there was no response.

She waited days, weeks, months, and still there was no response.

“If he wanted to, he would,” she said to herself.

A few months later she got a text from him once more, and as though she hadn’t been through it before, she responded. It was like nothing had ever happened.

Ghosted After The Perfect Blind Date

How I Got Stuck With The Bill After A Date With A Broke Guy

Single lady in Nairobi: when bae goes MIA

He Beat Her Up But It Took Two Years For Her To Realize That He Was A Monster

He Lied About His Life For A Whole Year – He Played Her Like A Game Of Chess

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The singlehood series is a collection of real-life stories and opinions from different people. It looks at the current world of dating in Kenya and experiences that people have gone through. The views and opinions expressed here are those of the contributors and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of