We all know it’s hard to get along with your ex. Though a blissful happily ever after may not be your reality, that shouldn’t be the end of the road especially when there are children involved. With the ever-increasing rates of divorce, having separated parents is a norm for today’s generation. However, more people are embracing co-parenting with their former partners to be able to raise their children with shared values and principles. If you’re thinking about co-parenting, here are some important things you should discuss.
This is one of the first steps in establishing a good co-parenting relationship. Disputes normally arise when the parents can’t agree on their children’s routines. It’s important to establish common routines so as to have more consistency in the child’s life. Discuss when the child’s bedtime, mealtime, and homework time among others should be and ensure that it will be enforced consistently. This makes it easier to co-parent since you can agree on the basic things. How To Help Your Children Deal With Divorce
Relationships are another sensitive subject that you should discuss when co-parenting with your ex. Since both of you are free to date, you should set some ground rules on what’s acceptable when it comes to your child. Some people prefer not having strangers around their kids. Let your former partner know your boundaries on introducing new people to your child. Additionally, keep the children in mind when getting back to dating as they also go through grief when parents separate. Here are tips for Dating After A Divorce
Having a consistent method of discipline is very important in order to raise thriving children. Since they’ll be going between two households, you need to decide how you’ll handle discipline and who’s responsible. Additionally, you may both have conflicting methods of discipline your children which should be discussed. Ensure you have a discipline plan that you can both agree on so that the child knows the consequences when they get in trouble. Step-Families: 6 important things to consider when blending a family
- Child Care Roles
If you have full custody of the child and your co-parent is not able to help with any responsibilities, you may have to assume all the child care duties. However, if you’re in a position to share daily roles, you should agree on them. For instance, one parent may be responsible for taking the children to school and picking them in the evening. This ensures that both parents are actively involved in their children’s lives creating a conducive co-parenting environment.
Normally, visitation rights are decided by the court in the event of a legal custody case. However, this isn’t necessary when you can come to an agreement while co-parenting. Visitation rights have to be fair for the other parent who doesn’t get to live with the child. If the child is still too young to sleep away from the mother, you can arrange for visitations at the house. When they become older, then they can spend the weekends and some holidays with the other parent.
Finally, you need to address the elephant in the room – finances. This is where many conflicts arise during co-parenting. It’s not easy to split expenses with your ex but it’s important to agree on their responsibility so as to have a peaceful relationship. You can agree on who takes care of the school fees and household expenses then devise a plan on how to take care of any unexpected expenses such as hospital bills. Ensure that you keep external parties away from your finance agreement.
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